That’s why you just pee in the sink

Heh. I can’t tell if this is a deliberate misinterpretation (in which case, pretty funny) or not (seems unlikely).

I broke my ankle taking out some recycling. It was sleeting heavily at the time and I was wearing my wife’s flip-flops because I couldn’t find my shoes (edit: fun fact, it turned out I had set the recycling on my shoes while looking for them). I slipped and fell off the front porch and my ankle broke when I landed.

I’ve dislocated my shoulder fourteen times, so I thought the ankle was just dislocated. Based on my experience with my shoulder, I tried to reset the ankle and stand back up … Twice. I only stopped because my neighbor heard me and came over to investigate; in a twist I wouldn’t believe in a movie, he turned out to be a physical therapist who mostly worked with ankles. He was a tremendous comfort because he was able to answer most of my questions while we waited for the ambulance.

The EMTs made me hop down the stairs of my front porch on one foot before they put me on the stretcher. To this day I wonder what they would have done if I’d broken both ankles or been several floors up or something.

I have so many stories about that night. It has shaped my life in one way or another ever since.