There’re better words to use in any situation.
To make the point more clear. As much as people tend to use it in the way they do for words such as ‘like’.
I mean people will just say f you, instead of thinking of a witty insult or express an emotion with more expression.
For example, say you want to express that a person is fat, which one is a more cutting way to tell someone they’re fat:
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“You’re a fat-f**k.”
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“Don’t bother trying to stand up. I know you haven’t done that in years.”
One more thing, As much as there is a time and place you don’t curse, it’s not a matter of “appropriateness” to me; what matters more is the impact of what’s said. I hope my example showcases that.
One last thing, - cause I just starting to realise this matter more to people than I thought it would (nothing wrong with that of course) - cursing doesn’t necessarily subtract from a remark as if it’s a negative number in a math problem, it’s just redundant for speaking (more often than not).
Southsamurai©sh.itjust.works gives a good example of cursing is bland as apposed to just using your brain.
Someone saying “I’m tired of this fucking rain” is more boring than someone saying “I really wish thor would give us a warning before bukkakeing the world”.
I just realise this will work as a post in a unpopular opinion space if that exist, lol.
Much of the time communication isn’t about being creative or coming off smart. It’s about effectively conveying meaning with the tools you have. Sometimes that means simple, crude language is more effective at conveying something than all the wit in the world.
So when I’m in a situation that calls for its use, I don’t care that “fuck off” is a dime-a-dozen phrase that doesn’t make sense. It’s never misunderstood, it’s cathartic to say, and I don’t need to think on the spot to figure out something more eloquent - my mind is on, y’know, who or what needs to fuck off instead.
Ok, I understand what you’re saying, saying “f you” is faster & easier.
2 (now 3) points I want to make:
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I getting this sense that instead of speaking to someone, it’s to let off steam. As you put it, “it’s cathartic to say.” I find that telling of a weak character to need to blow off steam because of a conversation they’re having.
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Since cursing usally indicates aggression, I can’t help but think if you are short on time then making people feel aggression is not the smart thing to-do.
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Cursing is just as impercise as using wit. I don’t know how it helps other than maybe show rage in a spit-second responce, but people have said “f you” in different kinds of context for different kinds of affects. At that point intead of “f you”, you can say “leave if you going to say such trash.” You could be more direct than using some vague swear word.
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why is letting off steam indicative of a weak character? I think that when under stress, it’s actually indicative of someone being emotionally intelligent to recognize they need to let some stress out and find an avenue for it. I can’t explain exactly why, but swearing has always been a pretty effective way for me to let out some stress mid conversation while staying focused on a problem.
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some contexts call for aggression. i.e. If someone’s making me or someone I care about uncomfortable in public, it can be pretty useful to bare my teeth back. A simple “fuck off” doesn’t require me to engage with any of their bullshit at all, gets the point across, and carries it with a mild aggression that actually does make people fuck off much of the time.
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it is imprecise, but in many contexts it’s precise enough to convey displeasure and dismay enough to get the point across. In fact the power of “fuck you” is in how concise yet universally applicable and understandable in so many situations.
For the first point, I fail to see how cursing dosen’t show your anger, if it’s going to be used to blow off steam. People have curse absent-mindedly when angry, I’d know, I’ve done it before. What good is this emotional intelligence if it’s going to give you the same results as if a person without it when in conversation?
The thinking of cursing being the method to use (with the understanding that we’re thinking of affective methods - not just punch someone in the face) doesn’t sit right. I understand getting angry (we all been there), however, you’ll be surprise in the power of taking a couple seconds to think it through.
When you think you have to say the thing that pops into your head right away, it ends up being ineffctive for commucation & won’t let others see the emotional intelligence that you’ve.
I know this seems to be a meme, but meditation & being mindful of your surroundings has help me “let out steam.” I also work on improving myself, when you try to remove curse words, you can find where you feel you need to say it and thus work on methods to help with that. When I think of emotional intelligence, I think of understanding the emotions you’ve & not letting them control your actions (think stoiticism).
For the second point, this only works when you can leave the situation and not have to worry about the consequences; it’s not going to work with cops, it’s also not going to work well for family (I’d know, having my christain grandma say f-you to me isn’t fun); I, in fact, find it hard to think of consequence-free moments for it.
For the third point, I see that depending on context, it’ll work, then it should work for wit, no? I fail to find the difference between wit and swearing for communication outside of it being easier to curse. If the point is cursing is faster & easier, then you’ve a point, but I’m thinking you meant something else or something more. Even for expressing anger, I find the clam looking anger to be more emotionally intelligent than throwing out a curse word that even a child can do when having a meltdown.
