About 3 or 4 years ago PayPal added the option to buy cryptocurrency, which I thought I’d try. (Dumb idea 🙄)

Part of the sign up process was glitched. I retried and clicked submit one too many times, I guess. Now I’ve been unable to use PayPal for years. They blocked me because THEIR SITE was broken, but the web page essentially accuses me of being a criminal and asks for my bank records. No way in hell.

This was just for me to pay others. I can only imagine how awful PayPal is if you are a vendor.

Fuck PayPal.

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10 points

They named it after gazelle, which is a herd prey animal. That causes it to slip away from attention when it’s mentioned.

If they’d called in Bonko or something it would stand out in people’s memories more. Bonko, bright orange icon, it would spread by wildfire. Nobody would forget that name.

There are no hard consonants in the word. Synaesthetically, it’s a blue-purple word. Cool, muted. It’s a word that, even before the “gazelle” reference, is hiding there. Your mind slips over it without friction. It enters and leaves your mouth and your mind like a fish passing under the sparkling water, nearly unnoticed.

Terrible brand name. I mean, it does convey a little more safety than “Bonko” but the whole point with the unsafe sounding name is it causes the person to consciously ask “How safe is it?” and if you can answer that immediately with “Safer than Ft Knox” then it becomes part of the brand consciously.

Zelle is non-threatening, but that’s not the same thing as safe when it comes to business or finances.

What’s a good safe, energetic, competent, orange word for this service? Hmm. Bonus points if it’s intuitively self-descriptive.

How about “Paytag”. It’s yellow but whatever. Still might not be better than Bonko.

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13 points

I want some of whatever you’re on

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12 points

Bonko me $20 and I’ll send you some

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2 points

Trango

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1 point

There you fuckin go, that’s perfect!

Except it could be forgotten after just being heard once.

It’s a beautiful word. Gorgeously orange. With just a hint of collapsing chocolate cake.

Trango 👈👈

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