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4 points
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Maybe add to that “speaking to a real human” thing the provision that they be real humans who are actually empowered to address issues directly and immediately, instead of some call center where they keep you on hold for two hours before transferring you to someone who transfers you to someone else who hands the phone out the window to a passing town drunk who stumbles over to another call center where he chucks the phone through a random car window in the parking lot which just happens to belong to a manager just arriving at the office, who gives you a bunch of platitudes before telling you to mail a postcard with delivery tracking to a satellite office in the mountains from where it will be relayed on goatback to the bottom of a lake in a nearby fishing village.

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5 points

Coopting this for a dnd campaign. The quest to end the 24hr gym membership.

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