mhmmm
You speak about Cheddar doing stuff with Gouda you have denied yourself doing with Swiss for Gouda’s sake, and it’s making you vengefully jealous.
My question is - did Cheddar explicitly ask these sacrifices of you, or did you just assume that it would be the right thing to do? edit: nevermind, gotta read better…
I feel like both of you handled some things suboptimally, but this particular aspect sounds like you’ve been doing this to yourself by assuming instead of communicating.
Generally I don’t really understand this situation. Jealousy is not something that just happens to someone and has to be avoided. Jealousy is the flashing warning signal that something is not right (like a relationship that is unstable, or a need that isn’t met), and the starting point of a conversation, not the end of it. But there doesn’t seem to be a conversation around that in your story. Why not?
Just wanted to let you know - I am currently examining my anxiety and exhaustion generating work and study habits hard (and why they are so easy patterns to slip into), and your post helped me answer a question I had and couldn’t quite grasp.
Because for me, I generate The Dread© by imagining the disappointment of my professors, my boss, or parents, or whoever gave me the task or has a stake, if I don’t do it in time. Which also means that I can’t really do stuff for myself unless I imagine my therapist being disappointed or something. Which leads to weird and unusual attachments to people who have no idea of their significance, and a LOT of social anxiety.
But knowing the functionality of this pattern should be quite helpful in gently disengaging from it 🙂 So thanks!
While possibly curmudgeonly, I see your point!
I personally am of the opinion that all of earth and especially all life forms should get the mysticism/wonderment treatment (that includes the photosynthesis in a big way!). I just think for a lot of people (me included) it’s easier with fungi because they’re usually not as neatly explained throughout school, and thus not in the “normal stuff, boring” category.
I hope it’s a kind of gateway wonderment for more nature appreciation in general :)