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confusedpuppy

confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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I have the ability to make others feel safe and comfortable to be their themselves. It’s always a shock to me how comfortable some people get around me. I’m still waiting for someone to make me feel the same way.

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It’s refreshing for me to see simpler, broader terms being used in discussions now about other people. This was something I began practicing for some time now as a response to the overwhelming number of labels that has shown up over time as the internet population increased.

Labels aren’t inherently bad or wrong, it’s obviously helped people find communities in an increasingly isolating world. It has however, based on my experiences and observations, created another situation where labels carry much more weight than they should in conversations and interactions. It’s very easy to box ourselves or other people into a strict definition of those labels. Humans are far too complex for such restrictions based on words.

I also feel that such a strict use of labels has created a war of labels. Instead of addressing differences or issues, it’s simpler to throw an accusative label and claim a moral superiority. Not only does this create no room for productive discussions, it also causes strong emotion responses which further breaks down discussions.

I do hope that “weird” carries it’s momentum forward beyond the word itself. That it pushes us towards speaking to each other using simpler, broader and descriptive language. It would create a more inclusive environment where people of varying levels on language knowledge are being included in the conversation and are able to participate in those conversations.

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I generally lurk more than I post content or comment because I naturally tire from the vast majority of online and offline interactions with people. The exception being those people who share the same autism/adhd based experiences and perspectives that I do.

When I interact with fascists online, I already know it’s a dead end to the conversation before it starts. That’s why I begin an interaction with a fascist with the mindset of it being a chance for me to learn and understand their mindset instead of trying to change a person. I also have a 3 comment limit with a rough plan on how my comments will be used during this interaction.

The first comment generally asks to clarify a specific point that they are making. The second comment depends on the response I get but usually ends up with me pointing out a flaw or contradiction from the fascist. The third is a closing thought and a reminder of how they failed to have a clear and understandable argument to continue the conversation.

I have a very broad and hard to explain understanding of how hate and emotions work. This comes from experiences and observations from my life. So this comment format sort of plays out predictably when the fascist inevitably responds after my final comment. That’s where I find the most insight into their thoughts. That’s where I find that missing bit of information that makes it click for me.

I rarely engage them unless they spark a morbid curiosity in me. It’s better that way since it’s much easier and mentally healthier to just let them pass by my screen than to weigh down my thoughts with pure negativity.

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I appreciate the suggestions but this brings up another issue that I have had with these types of conversations. Far too many of the people I’ve spoken to live in a constant state of hypocrisy or contradiction.

It’s going to be hard for me to fully explain this as I just don’t have the energy to deal with people anymore and have chosen to keep in contact with very few people over the past few years. That is to say, my contact with people in general has been somewhat limited.

It does somewhat go back to my points about defensiveness and defending peoples and systems that are oppressive. On many occasion, explaining certain hypocrisies as simply and clearly to the best of my efforts was still seen as an attack on themselves. The simple suggestion that change for all requires change on a personal level was unthinkable for them.

Even though capitalism is causing so much unhappiness in their lives, they want it to stay because it seems to me that it brings them a sort of comfort through habit or routine. Disrupting what brings their vision of comfort is scary and so they react in hostility.

I say all this through my experience of fighting for the right to be treated with dignity in a workplace that was crumbling under it’s own weight of sexism, racism, classism and ageism. Where it was important to have as many people be supportive of what I was fighting for so we could all benefit together. What I received was constant shame and belittlement for opposing authority alongside praises for opposing authority. From the same people. Does that make sense? Not to me.

Humans are complex. Far too complex for me to even attempt to explain how complex they can be. Unfortunately, I just no longer have the energy or patience to continue. Especially as a person of colour in a small conservative town.

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Both points are very valid. I have had a difficult time trying to approach the topic of alternatives to capitalism with other people.

I try to speak to them in language that they would understand. I also try to speak to them in a way that would empathise with them. I am very careful with my words because I do not want to accidentally or directly attack them and cause a defensive response. Once someone becomes defensive, they are more likely to reject what’s being said to them and become hostile towards me and my lifestyle.

The most common issue I have in these conversations is that the other person I’m talking to appears to be unable to imagine another life without capitalism. All their problem solving skills heavily rely on buying more. Their long term goals center around accumulating wealth. The people they look up to and attempt to follow are all wealth hoarders.

I don’t expect to be able to deprogram anyone from the constant propaganda produced by capitalism. It does sadden me though. The people that I talked to are just not curious about any alternatives and would rather defend a lifestyle and the systems that oppresses their very own happiness and freedom to be themselves. These conversations exhaust me and now I’m just too low on energy to have the motivation to try anymore.

I do hope to one day see the start of change. Where common people finally understand just how hilariously outnumbered wealth hoarders are and begin to work together to rebuild communities that reject and fight against such oppressive peoples and systems.

Unfortunately without much support, especially from any local community, it’s hard to even approach this issue.

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I’m okay with this, I’m away for the next two weeks so there’s no one to manage my garden except to water it. I’m going to give a few excess cucumbers to my neighbours before I leave though.

I’m also big into collecting seeds and have plans to save a few cucumbers to allow them to age naturally. At least I assume that’s what I can do. This is the first year I’ve managed to grow cucumbers and not just the flowers. I also have a habit of letting plants grow a bit wild the first time as I watch how they grow. This way I have a better understanding for myself of how to manage them next year.

It seems like I could treat the cucumber plant sort of like the tomato plant, trimming excess growth to promote veggie/fruit growth but I haven’t gotten that far with experimenting yet.

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It’s actually a trick of the lens, those cucumbers are obscenely huge… I didn’t even plant cucumbers there, they just showed up and took over.

I may have “lost” a cucumber in the grass, sure hope whoever finds it enjoys it :)

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When his arm is hanging at rest, in a neutral positon when standing, that tattoo will be upside down.

From my experience and from listening to others, good artists will make an effort to point this out. Especially with something as permanent as a tattoo.

I going to believe that the artist who did this purposely forgot to mention this little bit of information for the pettiest of reasons because it makes me giggle a little.

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It brings me some comfort seeing how clear and easy to understand language is being used against these angry people.

They are being forced to explain their behaviour instead of arguing the specifics of words. It’s subtle but effective in my opion.

I am really enjoying this.

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I’ve been enjoying the use or weird lately. I’ve had some strong personal opinions on language lately. A lot of it comes with a huge increase of new words that sort of seem abstract from it’s meaning.

I think with how rapid information can spread to large groups of people, it’s just too fast for my mind to keep up. All of a sudden I feel like I’m in a war with words and who knows which landmine of a word will get you in trouble. It causes me even more anxiety when someone comes at you with manipulative intentions in order to control the direction of the discussion.

I think weird works because it’s an almost basic word. It’s simple and descriptive. It’s not a newer, more specific word that requires a deeper understanding of a broader topic. It’s understood by more people. People with varying degrees of language knowledge including people whose native language is not English. It’s easier for more people to understand.

It’s a lot easier to understand someone is weird compared to someone being a fascist.

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